New Year Resolution 2015

Finally, free and mood-ed enough to do this! A reflection of my year 2014 and a 2015 new year resolution.

My 2014 resolution is:

1. SAVE MORE MONEY!

2. Trying to be more updated on Arashi's news

3. Doing more art!

4. Change a job.

Well, after like a few years not fulfilling my major and first resolution; saving more money, finally I did it. It's partly cause my stable job which helped me. So, I did saved some money. Got worsen in Arashi's update and well, did not do more art but did 1 satisfying one and didn't even get my job changed.

So, reflecting what had happened in year 2014;

1. I still did not change my job but at least I got used to it and I really learned a lot of things not to say gain a lot of knowledge. However, I know people are starting to look down on me cause I have limited knowledge.

And getting to know Jeb so much is like a dream come true as he is totally my colleague crush! But he resigned, and his last day with me alone in his car talking was totally unforgettable and awesome!

And also get to know Jimmy and Jordan better while being a short-term best buddy is really fun!

2. Went for 2 short trips with Mr Man and first time with Ah Wei & Amanda.

3. Got my hair curled-up again!

4. My christmas was kinda normal and a lil awesome and my new year eve kinda sucks.

Okay, seriously, I really didn't achieve much last year cause work totally took a huge part of my year. A peak period for my work took like half the year and other than that, it was all the normal routine of going to work and finish work. And I didn't even achieve any academic achievements. 

So, my 2015 resolution would be:

1. Save even MORE money.

2. Going on a trip to Hong Kong and/or Taiwan or anywhere out from my hometown. (At least I have went to Singapore in mid-January)

3. Get my job changed! (Planned, March to resign)

4. Maybe get a solo bridal photoshoot.

So, I'm gonna pump things up and not waste my 2015 like last year, although I have already simply wasted my January 2015 with loads of work! Gonna write an exciting 2015 story for myself! <3

**End**

Did you know?

Okay, first of all, HAPPY 2015 NEW YEAR! and a belated MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Seems like a happy post initially right? No. It isn't. I don't know whether to describe it as a spilling-out-the-truth post or whatever post you would like to describe it. I know it's the first post of the year, and the first post should be a happy one but, who cares. No one I know really reads this blog of mine anyway.

It was New Year of 2015. It was when I see, hear and speak the truth I've been keeping inside of me from him. Him, points to a good friend of mine, Xeng. I never knew that actually, he knew the truth earlier than I do.

There and then, after like 5 years, he finally asked what had happened 5 years back with that particular guy I now hated. Well, I didn't wanna say and tell as I care most for my friends and especially Xeng. But timing and fate got me to; we were stuck in the car park jam for hours during New Year midnight.

He asked. I didn't wanna say much but all I said was because I hated when that guy speaks bad about my friends. I hated it. He asked who was the person that he spoke of. I kept quiet. He knew who was I saying, he answered for me; it was himself. Surprisingly, he said he knew.

What surprised me most was he knew it all along, for 5 years. And I was like keeping this secret like forever, seeing both of the boys be such close buddies, I did not wanna be the bitch who goes talking bad about someone all around the world. I asked Xeng if he knows about our argument, and what shocked me was he didn't know at all! That guy didn't even tell him like I thought! Damn I was so naive. I should have just told him everything and hang in there with Xeng instead hiding and avoiding the fact from him! Damn!

Xeng even told me, that guy actually went to him and warned him not to come close to me because he loves me back in those time. I was like; What the Fuck is going on?! Why was I the only person, and the person who is involved, didn't know such thing! And damn! He even speaks bad about Wu Feng, my college crush?! And also my other friends behind me?

And Xeng proved me right all along, he was jealous! His jealousy was too heavy which took over him that chased away all my friends! And there and then, I thought maybe, just maybe I was wrong about that. But now I know I wasn't!

Xeng didn't say much about him, so did I during that very day. Thinking of why was I so innocent to keep the secret so to have them treasure their friendships that in fact that it was already lost 5 years ago? Why did I not stand strong on my point of view but let my heart go against it? I was too innocent. Damn I was!

That very night, such co-incident that he came along to have supper with us. I did not want to speak a word to him unless he does. He was still the same, looking down on people, faking around with his attitude. I know he was shocked on the way I spoke, the way I acted and stuff like that, it had really been years, since I last sat on the same table with him.

But now that I learned the truth, I really did see how Xeng is really treating me very well as a real true friend. And yet, I was trying to avoid bringing up this topic when he was with me all along, putting a wall in between us. That very night, he knew I would be lonely, yet, he came entertaining me that night.

No hard feelings, but this is how I felt all these years.

**End**

I'm still waiting

Around 5 months, I'll be in a whole new life than now. My firm is now, I can consider averagely okay, maybe I'm used to it already, however, life is so meaningless there. I can't get a higher pay and I have to do twice a person's work. In 5 months time, I'm gonna resign and go out from the firm.

Life recently have been quite calm, except from being sick more often than usual. Nothing really much happened, or either am I waiting for anything to come.

I don't know what to say at all about my life. I think I wasted my 2014. Well, except for improving my accounts' knowledge.

Anyway, some pics to describe my recent life.

 Felt myself prettier in this pic~ Lol!

Yes, in early October, I went to Cameron Highlands for a short trip with Mr Man and Ah Wei and Amanda. It's an overall fun trip I would say. *Smiles*

Nevertheless, went to Ipoh for a one day trip in mid year~ 

I don't know what will come in future, but I sure know I'm always waiting for something to happen.

**End**

Feeling Grateful

Every morning, you walk into a glass door lazily, seeing the usual high staircase and the smell of coffee which lingers around you as you walk to your seat, making you think and sigh; here goes another day.

However, at the end of the day, you looked at your bunch of freaking insanity colleagues, you thought to yourself; that morning blue you had everyday wasn't that bad afterall!

Ya know, I really hate my firm so much to the extend I really wish this firm would just go out of business!

But one thing which pulled me back each and everyday is my colleagues and manager who were really awesome people.

As time goes by, as relationships get closer, as people reveal their personalities and as you start picking up who really is your real true friends, you know they are one of the best colleagues nevertheless also your friends, you have which no one will be able to replace them!

Sometimes you know you got left out, especially you know they are not the same gender as you, but when you face difficulties, you know they are always there for you. Especially your manager who has been protecting us all these while!

Also, to the extend where you know if one day, you are out from this firm, in a new place you worked without them, you will miss them without a doubt.

To the extend when one of them tells you they have resigned before you, your heart crushed and bleeds inside out, with teary eyes, swallowing the fact.

You know you love your colleagues and you love working with them tho your job sucks! 

And that's when you realized, you have to face the fact that one day, they will leave you. So do you, who will leave them.

And then, you start appreciating them as much as possible as you never know when will be their last day being your colleague.

 The 2 guys who always made my day! <3

The only girl who bares with my complains and grumpiness! <3

I love you guys. You guys made me everyday full of laughter.

**End**

Robotic Life

06/05/2014

Life has been really robotic for me lately. Ever since I started this work, I find my life not interesting at all. I do not know what I am doing everyday and night. All I know is that I wake up, I go to work, and I work again and I go home and I watch the tv endlessly until I fall asleep. Then it repeats again, and again, and again, and again...

I went to the fortune teller last Saturday, that master told me that all other jobs I'll be working in the future will be the same. So why change? I thought of changing my job lately, cause I've been really tired of deadline each and every month. So, I'm thinking to go a different path, thinking to go study again for another course. Neglecting my job.

When I started working, my friends told me, they are gonna concentrate more on their studies (professional papers) then their work while I'll concentrate more on my work than my papers. However, it seems like I'm the only person who is still insisting on my decision. But because I've passed my first 2 papers, I rewarded myself a rest for a semester without studies. Ya, right...a rest. It ended me up with a real stressed up working life. My work is really driving me crazy. Actually it's my boss who is driving me crazy.

I'm so stress that holidays or any trips wouldn't even let me rest well. All I think of is my job. Seriously, I'm really a stupid person. I know it's not worth dying for a Company, cause all the hardwork you did was all Company's profit, not yours. However, I still got so stress up for work.

No one can really help me except for myself. No one can really relax me except for myself. Life is so lame. Especially when you see some of your friends, earning so much more than you, you really got stress up and started thinking why can't you earn that much too? You're not any worst than them. But this is what I call fate. Maybe I might change it someday, but not now.

Whatever it is, I'm really tired of my life lately. In addition of my deteriorating health. I'm starting to worry for myself.

And when you realize, friends around you are going off one by one, and you're still stuck here, you get really down. And when you thought you had that one person in our life, he's the one person who's the busiest person you've ever met. And it's like, the whole world has abandoned you.

I don't know what I'm waiting for everyday. What is my goal? I don't know at all.

When I was a student, I wait for holidays and most of all, for the day I graduate. After I graduated, I wait for the day I start working. And now that I've started working, I don't know what am I waiting for. What should I be waiting for?

Sometimes, I just wanna go up to my boss and just tell her that "I QUIT!". I think I'll be really happy. I'll feel so free, so not stress up, no more responsiblilities. But when I thought of it thoroughly, I might miss those times there with my colleagues and manager. And maybe my new work wouldn't be as fun as this one.

And most of the time, I just wish I could just go home and do nothing.

**End**

2014 New Year Resolution

Just seems like I have time today. So, I'll write about last year's reflects and this year's resolution!

So, my 2013 New Year resolution were:

1. Still and again, save more money.

2. Still, go more crazy about Arashi

3. (Leaving blank)

So, the year 2013 wasn't that nice cause I haven't done any of my resolutions. So bad of me.

Actually, I did save a lil money cause I started work and I'm starting to have higher income lately. But I really neglected Arashi like 90%. Such a shame of myself. And yet, I claim myself to be their fans for 5 years.
But I had already expected to be busier than before in year 2013.

So, anyway, reflecting what happened in year 2013:

1. Graduated from my degree as a BA Accounts and Finance.

2. Went to Cameron Highlands with KY, Dydy, Von Von, Tine Tine and my ex-boy. Also went to Lost World without my ex-boy. And went to Genting Highlands with my ex-boy, went into casino for the first time.

3. My valentine's day wasn't the best but it's one memorable one, especially the pretty rose I got.

4. My dad got me 3 new pretty and limited watches.

 

5. And I won a photography competition in First Avenue Mall!

6. Tried lots and lots of places' food and drinks.
7. Oh! Went to Langkawi Island with those crazy and nutty classmates from SEGi college! The best trip I've ever been! Nevertheless growing a closer friendship with them.

 

 

 

8. And so, found myself a job, started working life.

9. Getting myself into this professional papers, ACCA.
10. Last but not least, my dad is totally safe from this second major operation. Thank you god!!

Things and events do go good, however, let's not forget the bads and those hard times.
1. As time goes by, I hate my job. I hate it there. I hate it so much that I cried myself to sleep almost every night that those time. (I'm better now, getting used to my job).
2. Fell sick more often than usual.
3. And the major thing which happened to me in 2013 was, I broke up with my boy.*

And so, my 2014 resolution is:
1. SAVE MORE MONEY!
2. Trying to be more updated on Arashi's news
3. I'll go for art. Doing more art!
4. Changing a job!

And again, each year teaches me to grow up. Each year teaches me lessons of life, and each year helps me to grow stronger than before.

 I wish year 2014 would be nicer to me.

**End**


*P.S. At times, I still think of him, I just go so sour that I could just hug my Teddy, hoping Teddy would just comfort me. It's near 4th March 2014. It was supposed to be our special day but I didn't make it. Not him, it was me. I still miss Bear Bear, Panda, Stitch, and all those memories we had a lot. However, I will never ever forget this boy, who changed my life a lot. Thank you.

Best of luck to you.

Tough Life

Yea, have been missing for quite a while, due to my busy life at work.

Work has been really tough to me these weeks cause of peak period and which I had to settle 5 files in 2 weeks! My idiotic boss has not been nice to me. My colleagues, they are nice people, well....sort of...nice....

As a conclusion, I hate my job.

Like Jordan told me: A.U.D.I.T.O.R. = All U Do Is Think Of Resigning!

So, in my next post, I'm gonna write about my new year resolution 2014. Like what I did every year. It's just that I've been too busy with work lately, I even have to work on Saturdays, and when I got home, I just wanna plop on my bed and just laze there till I knock out.

Chinese New Year is near, but I still have to work tho, luckily my leave has been approved but only for 2 days. What a celebration.

So, I still hate my job and I just hate my low paid salary!

**End**

A Lil Celebration

26th November 2013: remarks OHNO SATOSHI's 33rd birthday! Love him so much!

Although I haven't been into Arashi so much lastly but I still remember their birthdays and celebrate for them!

Otanjoubi Omedetou! <3

Anyway, a lil update about myself lately;

Just started on leave from my work cause my exam, ACCA is less than 2 weeks away.

Work is totally killing me! Hate my work!

Exam is also killing me! Haven't been so scared of exams so much in my life, cause I haven't really started studying at all!

Oh~ And I had my hair cut! Short! >.<

Just passed my convo 2 weeks ago! It was normal and also great!

 

My dad's going on an operation on the first day of my exam, shouldn't have taken the exam. Regret!

Feeling so busy lately, feeling so tired. Really need a break from everything.

**End**

P.S. You might not believe it but I still miss you a lot.